I am really quite an excitable person.A couple of weeks ago, when I was excitedly waiting for school to start, I was thinking of all the years I have started school - 13 years of kindergarten through high school, 7 or 8 semesters at Rice, a couple of semesters at HCC, and about 25 semesters (including summers) at Metro.
With the possible exception of kindergarten, which I can't remember, I have never not been excited to start school. I have never not been excited both to start school, and about little details of starting school. The new pencil box. The blank paper. The freshly sharpened pencils. The locker! Living in a dorm! Advanced Calculus!!
And, looking back at all those times, I don't feel in retrospect that the excitement was misplaced or silly. I don't look back at my 10-year-old self, about to start 6th grade, excited about now being in middle school, and think the excitement was wrong, or that the whole thing turned out to suck after all. Because I am still the same way, it's like a continuous thread connects me to my 6th-grader self.
Although school is very salient, I am basically this way about nearly everything that I have to wait for. A new job, a doctor's appointment, a visiting friend, the next episode of a TV show - I get excited about anything. (No wonder I'm not very patient.)
I'm like a dog, except blessed (cursed?) with the ability to think about the future.
3 comments:
I always loved school starting and I still love to go to office supply stores. There's nothing like new pencils, pens, paper, folders, binders. Alas, these days when I go to the office supply store it is to buy stuff to organize all our paperwork. Not nearly as much fun or anticipation as school starting.
For me, the distinction between "excitement" and "anxiety" is a fine one a lot of the time. I'm trying to work on my attributions.
That's true for me when I have had too much caffeine. Suddenly even mild anticipation makes me anxious. (I know caffeine isn't your problem.)
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